Relational Communication

Good Morning everyone

I hope everyone had a great Christmas and I pray you have a wonderful new year. we are going to start a new series this morning about "Relational Communication". 'Communication' along with 'love' are the two key components we all need to possess within ourselves and also desire to receive from others if we are to have good relationships. So lets get started.....

As a prisoner for the Lord, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Ephesians 4:1-2

Relational Communication Defined:  Relational Communication is where two people are free to share openly with each other, without reservation, their thoughts, feelings, fears, and insecurities.  

Why is it importance to have healthy communication? It...

▪        Draws people together.....Open communication creates a 'safe enviroment' for people to share and be themselves without fear .  If we feel safe in our surroundings meaning ( we can be honest with ourselves and with others),  we will be more apt to share our deep thoughts with another person. As a result, close  relationships will be build and last a long time.

▪        Helps us to understand each other better ...One of the biggest problems in relationships is thinking we know someone only to find out they have not been totally honest with us. In other words, they have been hiding something or things that they don't want us to know about.

We may think that things in/from our past does not involve our life now, but they do and will have an effect on our relationships today if we have not dealt with them. they have a way of showing up when we least expect them to, usually in the form of  mirroring something that was hurtful from the past. that is why it is important to be open and honest with out past with those we love (spouses, friends) so that those past painful experiences won't carry over into our life today.   

▪        Reveals our true thoughts and feelings....Many of us are not comfortable with sharing our true feelings and thoughts out of fear of possible abandonment, rejection and acceptance. Have you not heard someone say..."I am not comfortable being open with my feelings" "that is just the way I am"! It is not just the way we are, we were created to be open and relational which includes among other things being open with our thoughts and feelings.. 

▪        Causes others to feel valued....When we listen to others with a sincere purpose to hear what they are saying from our heart, it brings value to that person. We are not listening when we can't wait to get in the next word or looking around the room when someone else is speaking. That de-values the person and says without words that what you say is not important. 

▪        Opens the door for deeper relationships to develop...Open communication and honesty are the keys to building deep intimate relationships. If we get off track, we purpose to get back on track. it is a life long goal with relationships. Rome was not built in a day correct? Neither is our desire for close relationships, it takes time and work on all of our parts, it is never just one person's fault in a failing relationship anymore than it is one person's victory in a lasting relationship. It takes two people committed to one another with God at the center for relationships to grow and mature.  

▪        Removes doubt and suspicion.....If we are open and honest with our life, we will never have to worry about being caught in a lie, or worry about what our past may reveal about us or others. It is on the table no secrets. that doesn't mean we have to share everything with everyone to be open, that is not even wisdom, but what it does mean, is that at any given moment I am ready to be real, not deceptive or evasive about who I am. this is true freedom!

▪        It builds trust with others....Trust is everything! If trust has been damaged in our life at some point and we are having trouble trusting others because of it, I understand. It is not impossible to trust others again or even the ones who have violated our trust in the past, but we must try! Change is a key component if trust is to be restored with a person who has violated your trust. It is not impossible, but necessary to see change happening in another's life if trust is restored.

There is another key component to trusting others again and that is forgiveness. Unless we forgive, our heart will harden and make it impossible to trust anyone again including our relationship with God. This is not where we want to be or stay at as bitterness wll take us down a path of despair and hopelessness. Trust God and look to Him to heal your heart and set you free.

 Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God , trust also in me. John 14:1

So then, men ought to regard us as servants of Christ and as those entrusted with the secret thing of God. Now it is required that those who have been given a trust must prove faithful. I Corinthians 4:1-2

We will continue on next week with what "Unhealthy Communication" looks like. Have a great week see you then.

love and Blessings

Dee