Good Morning Friends
Last week we began a series on "The Hiding Places Of Anger". today we will look at lesson 2, 'the many faces of anger. Anger is not always expressed in a rage or with force that most of us would recognize as being the normal expression of anger. There can be more suttle ways of expressing anger that appears less threatening on the surface, but just as deadly in its approach. Anger can also hide beneath a calm demeanor and a smile, but its words cut deep into the soul of the person receiving it.
So lets take a look at some of these faces of anger this morning. let's get started:
Anger is a powerful force that can work in a positive or negative way in our lives
Why do we avoid looking at anger within ourselves and others?
◘ There is the Fear of conflict.....Many of us do not like confrontation because we are afraid of what that confrontation may lead to. There is always the chance that Conflict will lead to separation in relationships and most of us don't want to take the risk of that happening if at all possible. Confrontation can be a good thing if the goal is to help the other person, but if that is not the goal it most likely will lead to one or the other getting hurt.
◘ Fear of abandonment.....None of us want to loose close relationships, but the fear of losing a relationship will prevent us from approaching them with things that are on our heart that we see as being harmful emotionally or perhaps even physically. the fear of loss and abandonment will stop us from addressing things with those we love or desire to be close to, even when we see that their actions and behaviors may become harmful to us, others or themselves. The fear of abandonment is a root problem especially in situations that are abusive or have the potential to be abusive.
◘ We want to protect ourselves from potential hurt and painful situations...Even when we know we have anger issues, it can still be a challenge to deal with that anger for fear of what may happen in our current living situations or what may come up as a result of past painful experiences.
The fear of reliving things again that was once painful or addressing current painful situations that a person may be living in can be scary and difficult to face. We try and protect ourselves by avoiding and denying the problem altogether.
◘ We are not ready or willing yet to take personal responsibility for our own actions. Anger is an issue that we need to be willing and wanting to change in our lives. If we are not ready it will not be dealt with. also, pain and wounds lie beneath anger, so if we are to be healed of our hurt and pain we also need to be willing to look at our anger that is present because of those hurts. anger can also be used as a self protection for us as it can be intimidating to others causes them to back off when they get to close to these issues in our lives.
◘ There is a deep need for approval…A person's need for acceptance and approval will hold a person captive to abusive situations because of a person's great need to acceptance, approval and value. this is why it so important for a person to know they are loved by God. Because when others fail us we know because we know God loves us and will always never abandon us. Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices, my body also will live in hope, because you will not abandon me to the grave, nor will you let your Holy One see decay. You have made known to me the paths of life, you will fill me with joy in your presence. Acts 2:26-28
Do not work for food that spoils, but for food that endures to eternal life, which the Son of Man will give you. John 6:27
We will stop here for now and next week we will take a closer look at the "Many Faces of Anger". thank you for reading these blogs and please pass them on to friends. I will see you next week.