Thank you for joining me this morning as we continue on in our series of 'Communication'. Communication is a vital tool for all of us to master. But it is not always accomplished in the way we desire. Why? Well, for one reason not everyone is on the same page as we are and we all look at things in different ways. So, lets get started this morning and discuss 'what do we do when nothing seems to work'?
• Check out the attitude! (out attitude is the key to the outcome). Our attitude is so important! If we go into a conversation with a pre-set idea of what we want to say and are not open to what the other person has to say, we are setting ourselves up for failure.
Also, if our emotions are not under control and we go into a conversation with anger and hurt right up front it will put the other person immediately on defense and the conversation will only end up in a yelling match and nothing will be accomplished.
• Don’t panic! (Go back to where communication broke down And figure out what went wrong) If things get off track and we find ourselves heading down a trail that is totally off the subject, we need to get back on track. Sometimes in our trying to discuss something that is important to us with someone else, we have our own agenda and perceive how we want it to go.
But the effectiveness of it will depend on both parties. So, if emotions get out of control try and settle down and then continue. if that is not possible, then there needs to be more work done within ourselves for hurt to be dealt with before we can discuss it with the other person.
• Stay open and flexible. (Don’t allow yourself or the situation To go down old paths). If we go into a situation with an attitude of 'stubbornness' and 'wanting my own way', we will set ourselves up for failure. we need to be open to see our wrongs as well none of us are perfect.
Going down old paths in conversations are many times 'tactics' to divert the subject to something else. We do this because we are uncomfortable with the topic and try to avoid it. this is not a good idea and we will only prolong the outcome.
• Refuse to go backwards. (keep pressing ahead and change will come). It is easy to go down old trails and repeat things over and over again. this will accomplish nothing to do this. Sometimes we take these old paths as a means to 'divert' the conversation from where it is. We do this because it may be getting 'uncomfortable for us' to be hearing what is being said. We have to be determined to move forward and do what it takes to bring change. Remember, we have to personally be willing to change even if the other person is not. We are still responsibile for our actions and growth regardless of what others choose to do.
It is important to keep going forward and to stop looking back. there is nothing behind us that has not already happened and we cannot change what is already done. What we can do is to deal with the things that is keeping our focus on the past, such as old wounds, hurts, and losses.
Change does not come from living in the past, it comes when we take our lessons learned from the past and move into our future. Instruct them to do good, to be rich in good works, to be generous and ready to share, storing up for themselves the treasure of a good foundation for the future, so that they may take hold of that which is life indeed. 1 Timothy 6:18-19
• Always put God first. (when God is put first in any relationship, everything else will fall in its proper place.)
When God is put first in our relationships and in our hearts, we are putting Him in control of our lives and in every situation. He knows what is best for us even if we think we do. When we surrender the control of life over to him, not only will we have peace, but we can know that all things work together for our good. Trust in Him.
This will conclude our series on communication and I will be back next week. Remember, Communication alone is not enough. It is not enough to just talk for the sake of saying something. We must relate to those with whom we are talking with. Relating involves listening with our heart not just with our mind. When we really listen to what others are saying we position ourselves to be able to receive and to give of ourselves without reservation.
Love and Blessings